Empty Nest Halloweens just hit differently
This Halloween feels a little different. For the first time in decades, I’m in a totally new state, city & neighborhood — and I don’t know any of the kids knocking on my door. The people in my new neighborhood used to go all out and the realtor who helped us by this house told us “I hope you love Halloween because it’s a really big deal in this neighborhood.” This year, our HOA decided to stop people outside of our gated community from coming in and there’s a lot of upset people, but I’m sure it will still be a pretty big deal tonight. One thing is for sure, people really do go all out decorating their homes and it’s adorable.
I still bought the candy, of course — because you can take the mom out of Halloween, but you can’t take Halloween out of the mom. (And yes, I broke into the Reese’s “just to test for freshness.”) But somehow, we even forgot to carve a pumpkin this year and that feels almost un-American.
Fake Fall: Palm Trees, not pumpkins
Maybe it’s the Florida effect. Palm trees just don’t seem to go with pumpkins. Lately we’ve had some gorgeous almost fall-like weather but it still feels “off” to me. Maybe it’s how I’m wired…Halloween here just doesn’t feel quite the same as it did when I was growing up in Michigan — where you froze half to death trick-or-treating, buried under a winter coat, and nobody even knew who you were supposed to be. At least we earned our candy up there.
Ghosts of Halloweens past
For fifteen years in Chattanooga, I got to live in the sweet spot, somewhere in between — Southern Halloweens, warm enough for costumes without coats but still cozy, with crunching leaves beneath your feet and neighbors who all knew each other and made it fun! There was just something about getting your kidlets ready for their fun day at school and then planning for later on. The fun part was dressing yourself up as well, then calling the neighbors. “I’ve got the pudding shots in the freezer, see you at 6!”
Homemade costumes, dance-mom style!
My daughter was a dancer, so I got lucky: for many of those early years, I could repurpose one of her sparkly recital costumes into something fabulous for trick-or-treating. Her acro -ballet costume easily doubled as a harlequin jester! That adorable little teddy-bear dance number? It looks like Little Bo Peep to me! (wink wink) She was the only fairy with professional-grade rhinestones and false lashes. Of course, by the time the middle school years were approaching, all bets were off. (I’m looking at you, Miranda Sings!) 👀
Now, she’s living 11+ hours away, wearing her fourth costume this week with her sorority sisters and her boyfriend.
silent night, zero fright
And tonight, here we are — Mom and Dad, the seemingly “childless couple” who just moved in, standing in our driveway trying to look festive with a single uncarved pumpkin (how did we forget??!!!) and a bowl of mini Snickers. It’s strange and sweet all at once — this quieter version of Halloween. No fake blood on the counter, no glitter in the grout, no late-night candy trades to referee. Just us, the Florida warmth in October and the sound of neighborhood kids laughing somewhere down the street. Of course there are benefits…I mean…we can now have a few cocktails while handing out candy with no worries about having to stop and drive a child home who is suddenly sick from overindulging in too much candy! Still, the ghosts of Halloweens past find their way here.
I see them in the flicker of porch lights — little feet racing home, plastic pumpkin buckets swinging, the smell of wet leaves and sugar in the air. Those memories don’t need costumes. They show up just as they are. Soooooo tonight, I’ll hand out candy to kids I don’t yet know, wave at their parents, and maybe start some new traditions here. Because even if the trick-or-treaters don’t come, the memories always do — and they still know where to find me. ###
